Depression is an illness like any other, only it's symptoms are silent, lonely, and more complicated. We often don't see the pain because those who suffer become good at masking it, living in a dual world where they "perform" for their loved ones and peers and meet their demons in the dark of night. Many of us who struggle with mental illness find solace at the bottom of bottles, in little pills or powder, or in ever-evolving means of self-harm and body dysmorphia.
Our world has evolved into a place where isolation is the norm - we spend our "quality time" together staring at screens. We pacify our children with iPad games, teaching them to ignore their discomfort, rather than meeting their emotional need. More and more teens these days are reporting that they struggle with feeling depressed, isolated, and that they are ashamed of who they are, that they hurt themselves because of it.
In this time, it is more essential than ever for all our youth -regardless of background or aptitude -to have tools to deal with daily stress, positive coping mechanisms for challenging times , and healthy ways to express their emotions and needs. In The "I Am" Project classes, we open that dialogue with students in the classroom. Subsequently, with their parents and teachers too.
We teach that emotions are natural and even difficult ones can be tended to with patience and compassion. We teach that struggle is okay, and there is a lot of strength in talking about it. We give our students tools they can use, a language that allows them to express their "I am" - and to quiet their inner turmoil enough to be able to hear, and thus say "I am struggling, I need help".
Over the last three years, we have had students come forward and express their need to be heard, their struggles with their emotions, and among other things, ask for help with bullying, dealing with grief, and managing shifting home situations. Our students learn that emotions are okay - that finding their voice means they can step out of darkness, lighten the weight on their shoulders, and be who they are in their soul.
On the wake of Robin Williams' passing, perhaps we can take a moment to think about how the dialogue around mental health needs to change. It does not have to take a shocking and horrific loss such as this to wake us up to the dangerous reality of what many of our loved ones battle every single day.
The statistic is 1 in 4 people will struggle with mental illness in their life time. Imagine yourself and three of your friends. Or siblings. Or parents. Even some of us who have intimate experience with mental illness forget to be kind, compassionate, and patient with our peers whose demons are, perhaps, a bit more challenging to handle.
We are, as human beings, in this together. With the state of our world today, it is hard to imagine that a little compassion could make a big difference. But imagine - if 9 billion people tend to their corner of the world with a little compassion - well...that becomes a whole lot of compassion.
It begins and ends with each one of us. We need to be willing to talk, we need to be willing to work together to help those who still struggle and teach our kids ways to cope. Most importantly, however, we need to be willing to listen.
